An amiable host had to send late at night for a carriage to take home his four friends, who had taken too much of his wine. He gave the driver the street and house number of each one, and went to bed. He was in his first sleep when his door-bell was rung violently.
“What is the matter?” he called from his window, seeing that the carriage with his guests had returned.
“Oh, sir,” cries the driver, “please sort them out once more for me; they got all mixed up!”
The Wrong Man
A monk, a farmer, and a barber met on a journey. At night they went into a tavern, but when it was time to go to sleep the barber said: “Listen, friends, to me; this place looks suspicious. I hope they won’t rob us in the night.”
“Yes,” assented the monk, “I don’t feel easy about it either; but what can we do? We can’t sit here all night, we are all three dog-tired.”
“Oh, I know what we can do,” answered the barber. “One of us must watch while the others sleep. We will draw lots who shall be first, second, and third watch.”
The monk and the farmer agreed to this. Lots were drawn, and the barber was to watch first, the farmer second, and the monk last. The barber kept watch faithfully, and after he had done everything to keep awake he took from his bundle his scissors and other tools and soaped the farmer’s head and then shaved it as bald as the monk’s. When his time was up he shook the farmer and called: “Get up, man, it is your turn now!”
The farmer awoke, but when, still stupid with sleep, he put his hand to his head and found no hair, he grew angry and cried: “What a fool that barber is; he was to waken me, and he has wakened the monk instead.”