The procession is now rearranged, with the addition of as many red boxes and trays to contain the wardrobe, kitchen utensils, and the feast, as the means of the family or the extent of her paraphernalia require. As the procession approaches the bridegroom’s house the courier hastens forward to announce its coming, whereupon the music strikes up, and fire-crackers salute her until she enters the gate. As she approaches the door the bridegroom conceals himself, but the go-between brings forward a young child to salute her, while going to seek the closeted bridegroom. He approaches with becoming gravity and opens the sedan to hand out his bride, she still retaining the hat and mantle; they approach the ancestral tablet, which they reverence with three bows, and then seat themselves at a table upon which are two cups of spirits. The go-between serves them, though the bride can only make the motions of drinking, as the large hat completely covers her face. They soon retire into a chamber, where the husband takes the hat and mantle from his wife, and sees her, perhaps, for the first time in his life. After he has considered her for some time, the guests and friends enter the room to survey her, when each one is allowed to express an opinion; the criticisms of the women are severest, perhaps because they remember the time they stood in her unpleasant position. This cruel examination being over, she is introduced to her husband’s parents, and then salutes her own. Such are some of the customs among the Fuhkienese. Other usages followed in marriages and betrothals have been carefully described by Doolittle, with particular reference to the same people, and by Archdeacon John H. Gray, alluding to other parts of the Empire.[371]
The bridegroom, previous to the wedding, receives a new name or “style,” and is formally capped by his father in presence of his friends, as an introduction to manhood. He invites the guests, sending two red cakes with each invitation, and to him each guest, a few days before the marriage, returns a present or a sum of money worth about ten or fifteen cents, nominally equal to the expenses he will be considered as occasioning. Another invitation is sent the day after to a feast, and the bride also calls on the ladies who attended her wedding, from whom she receives a ring or some other article of small value. The gentlemen also make the bridegroom a present of a pair of lanterns to hang at his gateway. On the night of the wedding they sometimes endeavor to get into the house when the pair is supposed to be asleep, in order to carry off some article, which the bridegroom must ransom at their price.
Among the poor the expenses of a wedding are much lessened by purchasing a young girl, whom the parents bring up as a daughter until she is marriageable, and in this way secure her services in the household. A girl already affianced is for a like reason sometimes sent to the boy’s parents, that they may support her. In small villages the people call upon a newly married couple near the next full moon, when they are received standing near the bedside. The men enter first and pay their respects to the bride, while her husband calls the attention of his visitors to her charms, praises her little feet, her beautiful hands, and other features, and then accompanies them into the hall, where they are regaled with refreshments. After the men have retired the women enter and make their remarks upon the lady, whose future character depends a good deal upon the manner in which she conducts herself. If she shows good temper, her reputation is made. Many a prudent woman on this occasion says not a word, but suffers herself to be examined in silence in order that she may run no risk of offending.[372] Far different is this introduction to married life from the bridal tour and cordial greetings of friends which ladies receive in western lands during the honeymoon!
NUPTIAL PROCESSION AND FESTIVITIES.
The bridal procession is a peculiar feature of Chinese social life. It varies in its style, nature of the ornaments, and the whole get-up in all parts of the land, but is always as showy as the means of the parties will allow. It is composed of bearers of lanterns and official tablets, musicians, relatives of the bride and groom and their personal friends, framed stands with roofs carried on thills to hold the bride’s effects, all centering around her sedan. In Peking such a procession will sometimes be stretched out half a mile, and the sedan borne by a dozen or more bearers. The coolies are dressed in red, and they and their burdens are usually provided by special shopmen, who purvey on such occasions. The tablets of literary rank held by members of the family, wooden dragons’ heads, titular lanterns, and other official insignia are borne in state, an evidence of its high standing. In some places an old man, elegantly dressed, heads the procession, bearing a large umbrella to hold over the bride when she enters and leaves her sedan; behind him come bearers with lanterns, one of which carries the inscription, “The phœnixes sing harmoniously.” To these succeed the music and the honorary tablets, titular flags, state umbrella, etc., and two stout men as executioners dressed in a fantastic manner, wearing long feathers in their caps, and lictors, chain-bearers, and other emblems of office. Parties of young lads, prettily dressed and playing on drums, gongs, and flutes, or carrying lanterns and banners, occasionally form a pleasing variety in the train, which is continued by the trays and covered tables containing the bride’s trousseau, and ended with the sedan containing herself.
The ceremonies attending her reception at her husband’s house are not uniform. In some parts she is lifted out of the sedan, over a pan of charcoal placed in the court, and carried into the bed-chamber; in other places she enters and leaves her sedan on rugs spread for her use, and walks into the chamber. After a brief interval she returns into the hall, bearing a tray of betel-nut for the guests, and then worships a pair of geese brought in the train with her husband, this bird being an emblem of conjugal affection. On returning to her chamber the bridegroom follows her and takes off the red veil, after which they pledge each other in wine, the cups being joined by a thread. While there a matron who has borne several children to one husband comes in to pronounce a blessing upon them and make up the nuptial bed. The assembled guests then sit down to the feast and ply the sin lang, ‘new man’ or bridegroom, pretty well with liquor; the Chinese on such occasions do not, however, often overpass the rules of sobriety. The sin fujin, ‘new lady’ or bride, and her mother-in-law also attend to those of her own sex who are present in other apartments, but among the poor a pleasanter sight is now and then seen in all the guests sitting at one table.
In the morning the pair worship the ancestral tablets and salute all the members of the family; among the poor this important ceremony occurs very soon after the pair have exchanged their wine-cups. The pledging of the bride and groom in a cup of wine, and their worship of the ancestral tablets and of heaven and earth, are the important ceremonies of a wedding after the procession has reached the house. Marriages are celebrated at all hours, though twilight and evening are preferred; the spring season, or the last month in the year, are regarded as the most felicitous nuptial periods. From the way in which the whole matter is conducted there is some room for deception by sending another person in the sedan than the one betrothed, or the man may mistake the name of the girl he wishes to marry. Mr. Smith mentions one of his acquaintances, who, having been captivated with a girl he saw in the street, sent a go-between with proposals to her parents, which were accepted; but he was deeply mortified on receiving his bride to find that he had mistaken the number of his charmer, and had received the fifth daughter instead of the fourth.
The Chinese do not marry another woman with these observances while the first one is living, but they may bring home concubines with no other formality than a contract with her parents, though it is considered somewhat discreditable for a man to take another bedfellow if his wife have borne him sons, unless he can afford each of them a separate establishment. It is not unfrequent for a man to secure a maid-servant in the family with the consent of his wife by purchasing her for a concubine, especially if his occupation frequently call him away from home, in which case he takes her as his travelling companion and leaves his wife in charge of the household. The fact that the sons of a concubine are considered as legally belonging to the wife induces parents to betroth their daughters early, and thus prevent their entering a man’s family in this inferior capacity. The Chinese are sensible of the evils of a divided household, and the laws place its control in the hands of the wife. If she have no sons of her own, she looks out for a likely boy among her clansmen to adopt, knowing that otherwise her husband will probably bring a concubine into the family. It is difficult even to guess at the extent of polygamy, for no statistics have been or can be easily taken. Among the laboring classes it is rare to find more than one woman to one man, but tradesmen, official persons, landholders, and those in easy circumstances frequently take one or more concubines; perhaps two-fifths of such families have them. Show and fashion lead some to increase the number of their women, though aware of the discord likely to arise, for they fully believe their own proverb, that “nine women out of ten are jealous.” Yet it is probably true that polygamy finds its greatest support from the women themselves. The wife seeks to increase her own position by getting more women into the house to relieve her own work and humor her fancies. The Chinese illustrate the relation by comparing the wife to the moon and the concubines to the stars, both of which in their appropriate spheres wait upon and revolve around the sun.
LAWS REGULATING MARRIAGES.
If regard be had to the civilization of the Chinese and their opportunities for moral training, the legal provisions of the code to protect females in their acknowledged rights and punish crimes against the peace and purity of the family relation reflect credit upon their legislators. In these laws the obligation of children to fulfil the contract made by their parents is enforced, even to the annulling of an agreement made by a son himself in ignorance of the arrangements of his parents. The position of the tsí, or wife taken by the prescribed formalities, and that of the tsieh, or women purchased as concubines, are accurately defined, and the degradation of the former or elevation of the latter so as to interchange their places, or the taking of a second tsí, are all illegal and void. The relation between the two is more like that which existed between Sarah and Hagar in Abraham’s household, or Zilpah and Bilhah and their mistresses in Jacob’s, than that indicated by our terms first and second wife, of which idea the Chinese words contain no trace. The degrees of unlawful marriages are comprehensive, extending even to the prohibition of persons having the same sing, or family name, and to two brothers marrying sisters. The laws forbid the marriage of a brother’s widow, of a father’s or grandfather’s wife, or a father’s sister, under the penalty of death; and the like punishment is inflicted upon whoever seizes the wife or daughter of a freeman and carries them away to marry them.