[MANNERS AND SOCIAL CUSTOMS 689]
For Men.—Whereas the married man may discharge some of his social obligations through his wife, the bachelor has no such resource. In response to every invitation, accepted or otherwise, he must pay a visit, leaving cards. Unless he does this, his invitations will soon cease.
A man may pay Sunday afternoon visits, as he is not supposed to be at leisure during the week. An evening call indicates greater intimacy. If he calls upon a young lady he must leave two cards, one for her and one for her mother.
Letters of Introduction—Letters of introduction are never presented in person. The man must call and leave the letter, with his card, but on no account enter the house. The next step is to be taken by the recipient of the letter.
At a Hotel.—If a man calls on a lady at a hotel he sends up his card and waits in a reception room. It is not permissible to write on his card the name of the member of the family whom he wishes to see. That is to be the subject of later inquiry.
Styles in Cards.—Styles in cards vary, both for men and women. Usually the stationer will be a reliable guide as to size and style of engraving. A printed or written card should never be used, nor, according to strict etiquette, should acceptances, regrets or informal invitations be written on cards. Use note paper.
A woman's card should be of medium size and nearly square. Plain script, Old English or Roman are the only letterings used. Engraved plates, once obtained, may be used a long time. The street address, if used, is at the lower right-hand corner. This can be changed on one's plate, if necessary, by ways known to the maker. Men's cards are much smaller than women's, and must be engraved. The name is always prefaced by "Mr."
Use of Names.—A married woman uses her husband's full name on her cards. A widow who happens to be the oldest representative of the family may have her cards engraved without her own or her husband's name, as "Mrs. Astor;" this signifies her place as social head of the family. A clergyman's card may have Rev. as a prefix; a physician's Dr., never M. D. A young girl is always Miss, and pet names are without social recognition. For a year after she enters society a girl has her name engraved beneath her mother's; where there are several daughters "out," "The Misses Smith" may be engraved under the mother's name. A widow may act her pleasure as to using her Christian name or her late husband's on her card; the latter is customary. It would be a social convenience to use the Christian name, as with the prefix "Mrs." widowhood would be indicated.