PROSPECTIVE SALESMAN (to sales-manager who has advertised for a salesman)—"I'm answering your ad in today's paper."
SALES MANAGER—"Had much experience?"
PROSPECTIVE SALESMAN (confidently)—"Yes, sir. I've sold most everything in my time."
SALES MANAGER—"Then try selling me your services!" Mr. Babcock was driving through the country, trying to buy a mule. He was directed to a colored man who had one for sale.
"Do you want to sell a mule?" asked Babcock.
"Yaas, sah," replied the owner. "May I ask whar yo' live, sah?"
"What has that got to do with it?" queried Babcock.
"Well," explained the negro, "I ain't gwine ter transfer dat mule to nobody dat lives less dan two hundred miles away from here. When I sells that mule I wants to git rid not only of de mule, but of all conversation appertainin' to him."
"Mr. Smith, I represent the Stygian Life Insurance Company. I know you don't want to talk to me or listen to me; I know you have all the insurance you feel able to pay for. I am not here to tell you your chances of dying tonight, or of being hit by an automobile on leaving this building; neither shall I try to convince you that my company can offer you anything more than any other well-managed, long-established concern. I shall not pretend that I am especially interested in your welfare and wish to do you a service. I am trying to make a living. Here is a blank application. You do not need to say any of the commonplaces. Good day, Mr. Smith.