"Witnesses?" echoed Sam in surprise. "No, suh, I ain't hab no witnesses. When I goes chicken stealing I never hab no witnesses aroun'."
An old colored uncle was found by the preacher prowling in his barnyard late one night.
"Uncle Calhoun," said the preacher sternly, "it can't be good for your rheumatism to be prowling round here in the rain and cold."
"Doctor's orders, sah," the old man answered.
"Doctor's orders?" asked the preacher. "Did he tell you to go prowling round all night?"
"No, sah, not exactly, sah," said Uncle Cal; "but he done ordered me chicken broth."
In times of peace Smith might have been an author who had drifted into some useful occupation, such as that of a blacksmith, but just now he is cook to the Blankshire officers' mess. Smith sent Murphy into the village to bring home some chickens ordered for the mess.
"Murphy," said Smith, the next day, "when you fetch me chickens again, see that they are fastened up properly. That lot you fetched yesterday all got loose, and tho I scoured the village I only managed to secure ten of them."