"Ah, now," beamed Mrs. Flanagan. "It's the darlint ye certinly are. I wor wonderin' how I cud raise it meself, sur."
BLONDINE—"Isn't Bennie Beanbrough the thick one?"
BRUNETTA—"He is all of that."
"I said to him 'every time I open my mouth I put my foot in it—'"
"Uh huh!"
"And right away the poor fish looked down at my feet."
An Irishman who is noted for his wit went into a public-house the other day and called for a glass of beer. The tumbler was not full enough for Pat's satisfaction, so he quietly asked the publican how many barrels of beer he sold in a week.
"Ten," replied the publican.