Two sailors, an Irishman and a Scotchman, could never agree, and the rest of the crew had become adepts in starting them on an argument. One day "patron saints" was the subject, of which the Scotchman knew nothing and the Irishman just a little.
"Who was the patron saint of Ireland?" said Jock.
"Do you mean to say you don't know?" said Pat. "Why, the holy St. Patrick."
"Well," said Jock in deliberate tones, "hang your St. Patrick."
In a towering rage the Irishman hesitated a second while he thought of something equally offensive, and then burst out with, "And hang your Harry Lauder!"
PAT—"Yis, sorr, wur-rk is scarce, but Oi got a job last Sunday that brought me foive dollars."
MR. GOODMAN—"What! you broke the Sabbath?"
PAT (apologetically)—"Well, sorr, 'twas wan av us had t' be broke."