Mem. for Young Housewives.—To make both ends meet—burn the candle at 'em.
"Pleasant it is when the woods are green," as paterfamilias observed when all the doors in his new villa took to warping.
The Dear Things.—He. You know Jones's wife, an old schoolfellow of yours; tell me, is she musical?
She (her dearest friend). I should say decidedly not, or she wouldn't be so fond of hearing the sound of her own voice.
The Kitchen-Range-finder.—The policeman!
Motto for the Lady of the House.—Don't worry about trifles; make a blanc-mange.