A FAIR OFFER
Athletic Barman. "Now, if you don't take yourself off, I'll precious soon turn you out!"
Pat (with a yell). "Tur-r-rn me out! Is it tur-r-rn me out! Thin, bedad! ccome outside, an' tur-r-rn me out!!"
Tourist. "When does the next train start for Cork, porter?"
Irish Porter. "She's just gone, sorr!"