Slopay—"And, doctor, if you will, I wish you would give me something to help my memory. I forget so easily."

Doctor—"Very well. I'll send you a bill every month."


If the devil lost its tail, where would he go to get another one?

To a liquor store where they retail spirits.


"What must a man be that he shall be buried with military honors?"

"He must be a captain."

"Then I lose the bet."

"What did you bet?"