Pat—Who is being lowered into a well; "Sthop, will ye, Murphy? Oi want to coom up again."
Murphy—Still letting him down, "Phat for?"
Pat—"Oi'll Show ye. Af ye don't sthop lettin' me doon, Oi'll cut the rope."
It is a Maine husband who has dubbed his wife "Crystal," because she is always "on the watch."
"So Maude is happily married?"
"Happily? I should say she is! Why she married a somnambulist, who gets up in his sleep every morning and builds the fire."
Two Hebrews went to a Mills Hotel and were obliged to take a bath before retiring.