"Oh, no," answered the boy quickly, "we have clean knives."


John—Say, do you want to get next to a scheme for making money fast?

Tom—Sure I do.

John—Glue it to the floor.


"Pa," said little Willie, who had been reading a treatise on phrenology, "what is a bump of destructiveness?"

"Why—er—a railroad collision, I suppose,"


He always kneeled before the maid
And kissed her finger tips;
But he lost out. Another man
Came by and kissed her lips.