Husband—"Down at the department store."

Wife—"Who put such nonsense into your head?"

Husband—"I saw a big sign in their window to-day, 'Ladies and gents' undressed kids for a dollar.'"


"Your father has a strong box at home, hasn't he, Willie," said the teacher.

"Yes'm," replied Willie; "the one he keeps the limburger in."


"This wireless telegraphy reminds me of a groundless quarrel."

"What possible connection is there between the two?"

"It's practically having words over nothing."