LADY—"Can't you find work?"
TRAMP—"Yessum; but everyone wants a reference from my last employer."
LADY—"And can't you get one?"
TRAMP—"No, mum. Yer see, he's been dead twenty-eight years."
TRANSMUTATION
Fred Stone, of Montgomery and Stone fame, and Eugene Wood, whose stories and essays are well known, met on Broadway recently. They stopped for a moment to exchange a few cheerful views, when a woman in a particularly noticeable sheath-gown passed. Simultaneously, Wood turned to Stone; Stone turned to Wood; then both turned to rubber.
TRAVELERS
An American tourist, who was stopping in Tokio had visited every point of interest and had seen everything to be seen except a Shinto funeral. Finally she appealed to the Japanese clerk of the hotel, asking him to instruct her guide to take her to one. The clerk was politeness itself. He bowed gravely and replied: "I am very sorry, Madam, but this is not the season for funerals."
A gentleman whose travel-talks are known throughout the world tells the following on himself: