"Well, I belong to three."
"What are they?"
"The Knights of Pythias, the Odd Fellows, and the gas company."
"Yes, he had some rare trouble with his eyes," said the celebrated oculist. "Every time he went to read he would read double."
"Poor fellow," remarked the sympathetic person. "I suppose that interfered with his holding a good position?"
"Not at all. The gas company gobbled him up and gave him a lucrative job reading gas-meters."
PUBLIC SPEAKERS
ORATOR—"I thought your paper was friendly to me?"