FROM OUR VILLAGE.
Mrs. Sharply (to the Doctor, who has looked in, having heard that her "good man" is ailing). "No, I thank ye, Sir. You see I've heerd of you, Sir, as you've been 'Practising' here for the last Three Years, and so I'd rather you went 'Practising' elsewhere, as I don't want no 'Speriments on my Old Man!"
At a recent Monday Pop Concert, Mr. Borwick put any amount of powder—everyone has seen or heard of Borwick's Powder—into his performance of "Suite Anglaise. "As a pretty lady observed, "He might just as well, or better, have put the name in English, and called it, 'The Sweet English Girl.'" Messrs. Joachim, Ries, Strauss, and Piatti, played a string-quartette in C Sharp Minor, and out of respect to the Ecclesiastical Season of the year, they gave marked prominence to the "Lento" in G. Flat.
A Genuine Building Society.—The Birds, just now. And its members are not even waiting for a Re-leaf Fund, which will, however, soon come, with "the flowers that bloom in the Spring, tra-la!"
The G. O. M. from a Musical Point of View.—When preternaturally alert, he is "Mr. G. Sharp." When depressed, he is "Mr. G. Flat." When himself again, he is "Mr. G. Natural." As being second son, he is "G. Minor." He is also hors ligne. But he refuses to be musically translated to the House of Lords, and become "The Upper G."
Q. What is the difference between a lover asking the object of his affections to marry him, and a guest who ventures to hint to his host that the Pommery '80 is rather corked?