Why the invariable factor in her seasoning

Always reminded me so forcibly of Beer.

Why, when my darling sighed, "The weekly books are ready, Ted,"

And I rejoined that we were thin while they were fat,—

Why, their increasing superfluities were credited

All to a manifestly unoffending cat.

Why, when a joint of whatsoever solid vastiness

Quitted the dining-room, it never came again;

Why my allusions to her culinary nastiness

Only encouraged her, it beats me to explain.