And examined your books and your papers;
And you can't pay a crown in the pound.
There's writs out against you by scores;
You're surrounded by tipstaves and bums;
So I wish you, my love, a good Christmas!
And a happy New Year—when it comes!
FEBRUARY.—Valentine's Day.
| 1837.] | FEBRUARY. | |||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| No more the farmer's dame shall rue | ||||
| The slaughter of her poultry crew; | ||||
| Compell'd, this month, to sign a truce | ||||
| With turkey, donkey, pig, and goose, | ||||
| The Cockney Sportsman grounds his arms, | ||||
| And dicky birds are free from harms; | ||||
| Percussion guns become a jest, | ||||
| Put on their caps, and go to rest. | ||||
| D. | Great Events and Odd Matters. | Prognostifications. | ||
| 1 | New River begun, 1608. Drunk at a Temperance meeting 1836. | than | ||
| 2 | Candlemas Day. Some dark affair now brought to light. | ☍ ♀ △ ♐ | ||
| 3 | Blaise. "Farmers, look to your ricks!"—Swing. | |||
| are dreamt | ||||
| 4 | A fair warms the bosom of Old Father Thames, 1814. | |||
 | of in our | |||
| 5 | ||||
| philosophy, | ||||
| 6 | ||||
| 7 | Shrove Tues. A great Fry-day. Mrs. Fry pan-egyrised. | ♀ ⚹ ♎ | ||
 | ||||
| 8 | ||||
| so are | ||||
| 9 | ||||
| there other | ||||
| 10 | ||||
| aspects, | ||||
| 11 | Sir Jeffery Dunstan. "No real knight." | |||
| 12 | 1 Sunday in Lent. Corporal punishment promoted by General Fast. | ⊕ ♄ ♌ ♀ | ||
| 13 | besides | |||
| 14 | Valentine. All Fools' Day. | sideral | ||
| 15 | ones, | |||
| 16 | VALENTINE TO MISS MARTINEAU. | that do | ||
| 17 |  | "Come, live with me, and be my love," |  | marvellously |
| And we to all the world will prove | ||||
| 18 | "That hill and valley, grove and field" | influence | ||
| Are waste, if Nature's stores they yield; | ||||
| 19 | While rustic joys and simple swains | ♉☊♀ | ||
| Are nought compared to rich men's gains. | ||||
| 20 | We'll demonstrate, to please the Tabbies, | and affect | ||
| That none but boobies will have babbies, | ||||
| 21 | And dose and diet all the nation, | us. | ||
| To check the growing population. | ||||
| 22 | Our virgin thoughts, as pure as "vargis," | ♐ ♋ | ||
| Will ne'er increase the public charges; | ||||
| 23 | So cease in frowns thy face to deck, | |||
| Thy mind's the best preventive check. | The configurations | |||
| 24 | ||||
 | ||||
| 25 | of the constellations | |||
| 26 | ||||
| 27 | ♀ ♅ ⚹ ☿ | |||
| do not | ||||
| 28 | Hare-hunting ends. Cats'-skins rise. | augur more | ||