I kant help but respekt the heathen, they hav made az good a showing on their kapital, az the christians hav.
Next to the mother in law, cums the Grandmother, to regulate the cook, the kat, and the baby.
LIBRA, THE SKALES.
For full particulars enquire ov E. & T. Fairbanks & Co.
THE APPLE DUMPLIN.
The dumplin are about the natral size ov yure phist, made out ov dough, and filled with apples. They are served up hot, with sum sweet-tasteing liniment on them, and are az eazy to struggle with az a sugar-plum. They aint so good kold az they ought to be. Kold dumplin, and raw potatoe, eat similar. I never et apple dumplin yet, without thanking the Lord for that one, and the Landlady for another one. Four apple dumplins, at one sitting, iz just about mi size. I wish i knu who invented theze kind-hearted balls, i would like to weep over hiz memory. Punkin pi, and apple dumplin, hav dun az mutch to civilize man az enny two missionarys that hav ever lived. Good vittles iz next to good morals enny how. Yu may talk about virtew az mutch az yu pleze, yu kant never inokulate a man with virtew fust rate on an empty stummuk. Giv a man four apple dumplin, with sum good kind ov ointment on them, and after he haz et them, and they hav settled down to hard pan, yu kan krawl up to him on either side, with a dose of morality, or even sum new kind of sope, for taking spots out ov clothes.
A STATEMENT.
Thare iz nothing about a man that will outlast a nikname, it will stik to him, az long az a bobtale will to a dog.