"You treat me," cried Mrs. Peck, "as though I was a monkey!"
"Oh, no!" responded H. Peck, "One can train monkeys."
"My lord," said the foreman of an Irish jury when giving in his verdict, "we find the man who stole the mare not guilty."
"Did the fisherman have frog's legs, Bridget?"
"Sure I couldn't see, mum; he had his pants on."
"A woman fell overboard from a ship yesterday and a shark came up and looked her over and went away."