Dear Captain Billy—What is a husband?—Little Willie.

Something no respectable woman should be without.

* * *

Dear Captain Billy—What is steam?—Talo Pott.

Steam is water gone crazy with the heat.

* * *

Dear Bilious Skipper—I am a bride of two weeks and my husband has broken my heart accusing me of extravagance and failure to economize in the home. I have tried lots of cheap dishes without success. Could you suggest a few menus which would enable me to make both ends meet?—Worried Marjorie.

Well, Marj, I am not much of an expert at cooking so I have referred your question to Maggie the hired girl. She suggests as a cheap dish, beans, but if you have tried them without success, why not try serving tongue and eggs?

* * *

Dear Captain Billy—Can you tell me where moonshine comes from?—Hugo Chaser.